“Usually when you listen to some statement, you hear it as a kind of echo of yourself. You are actually listening to your own opinion. If it agrees with your opinion you may accept it, but if it does not, you will reject it or you may not even really hear it. That is one danger when you listen to someone. The other danger is to be caught by the statement. If you do not understand your master’s statement in its true sense, you will easily be caught by something which is involved in your subjective opinion, or by some particular way the statement is expressed.” Suzuki
True in spades of anything Susanne says to me, or, presumably, anything I say to her. I try to be honest, open and straightforward with her ie uncensored, as I am, at the moment I write or speak, but it’s of course impossible to control her response, and likewise my own to what she does or says. Time and repetition helps. I wondered yesterday or sometime recently, if she went back and read me from the beginning, she’d understand me or what I am saying and doing better, and now I think, would or could I do that with all that she has written to me, and realise how painful and difficult that would be, and wonder if there would be any point, if I would grow or learn anything, or just feel miserable and unhappy all over again.
Sending each other quotes, or pictures, or video clips, like her coyote medicine card, is maybe an effort by both of us to take the subjective, game playing element, out of the equation.
Talked briefly to Aden. He’s back in the flat with Lottie, feels they have really reset and are talking honestly to each other. Worried about his visa situation - definitely doesn’t want to have to come back to the UK.
Suddenly got worried about Pol - she’s been very quiet for several days. Sent her a text. Realised I would have no way of knowing if she’d been carried off by the bug. (She’s fine)
“to express yourself freely as you are is the most important thing to make yourself happy, and to make others happy.”
The final message of Dark Matter - to be truly free, you have to leave everything behind, to step through the door into the truly unknown, the unasked for, with no expectation of “gaining”. To leave all unexplored possibilities behind. To meet this moment fresh, with a truly childlike, empty “beginner’s mind”. If only !?!
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Say anything you like. I do.