On Sat, 19 Oct 2019, 08:40
[Dear Belle]
Went back to my caravan at midnight, very fed up with S, and myself really. I thought it would be nice to spend our last few nights together – she leaves on Tuesday – and it was lovely to sleep together on Thursday, but she just began behaving really oddly, first like a prick tease, there's no kinder way to describe it, and then boring on in the dark about Bonnevaux and its problems as if it wasn't with us all day. I turned over and went to sleep but woke up sad and frustrated at midnight. If you're going to sup with the devil, use a long spoon. I have to drive her back to Basel on Tuesday and I'm dreading it. Feeling very sorry for self. But at least I'm sober.
On Sat, 19 Oct 2019 at 11:28,
Dear bell
still in the caravan . Enjoying reading and the brain enjoying breathing and the rain
Contemplating running away just leaving all this rubbish behind but i probably won't.
Love david
Dear B
in case you hadn't guessed that last was me trying to dictate an email again. Anyway, better now – as I keep forgetting, it's all pointless and futile, and at least I'm being breathed. The rain is beautiful. La B and I are going for a walk in it after lunch. Maybe I'll try and explain, or I won't. The Brothers Karamazov is extraordinarily apposite. It all started going downhill when we walked out of the Garden of Eden.
love d
Downloading The Laundromat from Netflix. It’s very popular apparently.
Dimitry is a saint, on the 13th rung of the ladder of humility (his account of and his doings with Katerina to Alyosha). He’s the eldest, but he’s the Prodigal. Alyosha’s just good. Ivan is the Elder Brother. Fyodorov K is surely not God?
I’m going to skip lunch. I wonder if MK or Henriette will come looking for me.
S came up to the caravan for a smoke and a coffee and a chat and then we went for a nice long walk down to Moulin Garnier and back. It stopped raining while we walked but otherwise it has rained solid for 24 hours. Apart from the drip through the roof ventilator (I’ve put out two pots) the caravan is warm and dry. I went down to do the washing up after supper and grab a bite to eat – no lunch today – and said goodnight to S. She came up after for a cigarette and left about 9. I watched the new youtube thriller Impulse, Episode 1 of Series 2, and then The Laundromat with Meryl Streep, all about the Panama Papers, and read a bit more of the Bros K. Asleep before midnight. A good day, mostly in my caravan. I won at Go against my 15 kyu opponent twice in succession. Meditated with yah weh. Wrote another poem. I did talk a bit to S about last night, but only to say how bored I was with talking about the woes of Bonnevaux, a.k.a The Tower of Babel. I did not mention her teasing. She didn’t really ask. I wondered if I was being a bit harsh sending her back off to bed in the pouring rain, but I think it was for the best, for me, if not for her. They’re giving her a leaving party tonight, just the permanent members of the community. Not looking forward to it. I may sneak off early. I haven’t thought of or got her any sort of present for her birthday.
Ingrid has emailed to say Camilla Keeling’s cancer has come back, and she now has a tumour in the brain, which sounds terminal. I’d like to go and see them when I’m back in England but I’ll have no transport. And Dave Robinson from Seatrade wrote to say Deborah Seyman has died of a heart attack. I used to flirt with her on the train back to London when I was reverse commuting to Colchester and would work late on a Thursday. I liked her a lot. I wonder what sort of life she had.
[Dear Belle]
Went back to my caravan at midnight, very fed up with S, and myself really. I thought it would be nice to spend our last few nights together – she leaves on Tuesday – and it was lovely to sleep together on Thursday, but she just began behaving really oddly, first like a prick tease, there's no kinder way to describe it, and then boring on in the dark about Bonnevaux and its problems as if it wasn't with us all day. I turned over and went to sleep but woke up sad and frustrated at midnight. If you're going to sup with the devil, use a long spoon. I have to drive her back to Basel on Tuesday and I'm dreading it. Feeling very sorry for self. But at least I'm sober.
On Sat, 19 Oct 2019 at 11:28,
Dear bell
still in the caravan . Enjoying reading and the brain enjoying breathing and the rain
Contemplating running away just leaving all this rubbish behind but i probably won't.
Love david
Dear B
in case you hadn't guessed that last was me trying to dictate an email again. Anyway, better now – as I keep forgetting, it's all pointless and futile, and at least I'm being breathed. The rain is beautiful. La B and I are going for a walk in it after lunch. Maybe I'll try and explain, or I won't. The Brothers Karamazov is extraordinarily apposite. It all started going downhill when we walked out of the Garden of Eden.
love d
Downloading The Laundromat from Netflix. It’s very popular apparently.
Dimitry is a saint, on the 13th rung of the ladder of humility (his account of and his doings with Katerina to Alyosha). He’s the eldest, but he’s the Prodigal. Alyosha’s just good. Ivan is the Elder Brother. Fyodorov K is surely not God?
I’m going to skip lunch. I wonder if MK or Henriette will come looking for me.
S came up to the caravan for a smoke and a coffee and a chat and then we went for a nice long walk down to Moulin Garnier and back. It stopped raining while we walked but otherwise it has rained solid for 24 hours. Apart from the drip through the roof ventilator (I’ve put out two pots) the caravan is warm and dry. I went down to do the washing up after supper and grab a bite to eat – no lunch today – and said goodnight to S. She came up after for a cigarette and left about 9. I watched the new youtube thriller Impulse, Episode 1 of Series 2, and then The Laundromat with Meryl Streep, all about the Panama Papers, and read a bit more of the Bros K. Asleep before midnight. A good day, mostly in my caravan. I won at Go against my 15 kyu opponent twice in succession. Meditated with yah weh. Wrote another poem. I did talk a bit to S about last night, but only to say how bored I was with talking about the woes of Bonnevaux, a.k.a The Tower of Babel. I did not mention her teasing. She didn’t really ask. I wondered if I was being a bit harsh sending her back off to bed in the pouring rain, but I think it was for the best, for me, if not for her. They’re giving her a leaving party tonight, just the permanent members of the community. Not looking forward to it. I may sneak off early. I haven’t thought of or got her any sort of present for her birthday.
Ingrid has emailed to say Camilla Keeling’s cancer has come back, and she now has a tumour in the brain, which sounds terminal. I’d like to go and see them when I’m back in England but I’ll have no transport. And Dave Robinson from Seatrade wrote to say Deborah Seyman has died of a heart attack. I used to flirt with her on the train back to London when I was reverse commuting to Colchester and would work late on a Thursday. I liked her a lot. I wonder what sort of life she had.
...So sorry taking your time...I´ve read this post:
ReplyDelete"...Saturday 19th October. Day 13 - goodbye and thanks for all ...http://gatfatf.blogspot.com › 2019/10
Oct 20, 2019 — And Dave Robinson from Seatrade wrote to say Deborah Seyman has died of a heart attack. I used to flirt with her on the train back to London ..."...I would like to know about Deborah Seyman´s death of a heart attack...; if she´s the same person I knew in the 70´s...I´m from Venezuela and my mail: delpozo14@gmail.com...Deborah (Debby) parents used to leave in Somerset...studied in Mexico...I will be very gratefull if you let me know about...