Lovely party (I think). Nearly tried emptying someone else's beer (without thinking, definitely drinking me reaction) but didn't. Gave away my alcoholic chocs, mulled wine and prosecco (dropped in by mindfulness Barbara, but she didn't stay). Brilliant band - Richard, Mia and Grinder. Bit loud at the start. I made a coherent, witty and funny (I think) speech which I remember, plus I remember nearly all the presents and who gave them to me. Apart from Jim and Chrissy, no one from the CoOp made it - alcoholic paranoia - were they pressured not to come by management? Or just no DD, maybe. No loss, really, everyone who came, including a surprise visit from Fred, was lovely and all seemed to get on.
Today, is Day 1 for no weed, and no more low alcohol beer. Gave the last of my weed back to Chrissy.
Feeling (inevitably) a bit deflated. Is that it? Keep my eyes on the road ahead.
List treats and my passion(s) for Belle.
Open Metanoia!
I've just turned everything off (FB notifications, all gmail marked as unread apart from Belle, no blogs apart from my own and Belle's, autoreply to contacts asking them to text or call me if necessary). Whoopee! I basically spent from 9am to 12am fucking about on the internet. Enough already. Then I meditated, and now I will eat my porridge and cycle into Fram.
Only I didn't (cycle to Fram). Feeling flat and tired and in need of care. Laura and Andrew will get me tobacco, and I have supper. reading my journal from last year when I went to Corfu and Naxos. Almost a carbon copy of this time - feeling crap a lot of the time, and then waking up and writing "another lovely day". A lot about Pol (divorce was going through, and I lost her pen). Generally, nice to be here, now, and not there, then.
Long list of treats to send to Belle, but very few are under $5 - most are rather expensive (e.g. a retreat). But still, good to exercise my imagination, let it rip. Build a boat. Why not?
No weed. No fake beer. Feeling a little low, and nowhere to hide. Supper, then bed. Understand why Belle recommends bed if all else fails. Perhaps I should have cycled into Fram, for the exercise if not the tobacco.
I may have just been hungry.
Moroccan green mint tea, and maybe another slice of death by chocolate cake.
It's nearly 1am. Listening to Belle's Hope podcast - it's very good. Shame she's only leaving it up for 48 hours. Treat getting / staying sober as a project. Use every tool / trick / help / support you can find, but just stick to the programme - to stay sober for xx days. In my case, now, apparently, for 100 days.
And enjoy being proud / pleased with myself for staying sober this long. Day 42 will be good - that would be the longest I've gone without a drink since I lived in the ashram (1973/74).
I'm going to have a mini-magnum. So what if it's evil.
Today, is Day 1 for no weed, and no more low alcohol beer. Gave the last of my weed back to Chrissy.
Feeling (inevitably) a bit deflated. Is that it? Keep my eyes on the road ahead.
List treats and my passion(s) for Belle.
Open Metanoia!
I've just turned everything off (FB notifications, all gmail marked as unread apart from Belle, no blogs apart from my own and Belle's, autoreply to contacts asking them to text or call me if necessary). Whoopee! I basically spent from 9am to 12am fucking about on the internet. Enough already. Then I meditated, and now I will eat my porridge and cycle into Fram.
Only I didn't (cycle to Fram). Feeling flat and tired and in need of care. Laura and Andrew will get me tobacco, and I have supper. reading my journal from last year when I went to Corfu and Naxos. Almost a carbon copy of this time - feeling crap a lot of the time, and then waking up and writing "another lovely day". A lot about Pol (divorce was going through, and I lost her pen). Generally, nice to be here, now, and not there, then.
Long list of treats to send to Belle, but very few are under $5 - most are rather expensive (e.g. a retreat). But still, good to exercise my imagination, let it rip. Build a boat. Why not?
No weed. No fake beer. Feeling a little low, and nowhere to hide. Supper, then bed. Understand why Belle recommends bed if all else fails. Perhaps I should have cycled into Fram, for the exercise if not the tobacco.
I may have just been hungry.
Moroccan green mint tea, and maybe another slice of death by chocolate cake.
It's nearly 1am. Listening to Belle's Hope podcast - it's very good. Shame she's only leaving it up for 48 hours. Treat getting / staying sober as a project. Use every tool / trick / help / support you can find, but just stick to the programme - to stay sober for xx days. In my case, now, apparently, for 100 days.
And enjoy being proud / pleased with myself for staying sober this long. Day 42 will be good - that would be the longest I've gone without a drink since I lived in the ashram (1973/74).
I'm going to have a mini-magnum. So what if it's evil.
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